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The one thing any romantic evening needs to have in common, regardless of how simple or elaborate it is, is that it requires some planning in advance. Another thing it needs is a break from the ordinary. This means adding some new items, such as clothing and decorations to not only get your lover's attention, but provide some fresh stimulation. Why?

Because, complacency can kill the romance in a relationship.

It can also kill the relationship itself whether the relationship has been going on for 6 months or 6 years. I can't say where the fine line exists between being comfortable and becoming complacent. Each person is different, and what one person may consider comfortable, another may consider boring. I do know the two go hand in hand to some degree, and I also know that when it comes to sex, if things start getting a little stale, that fine line can become much easier to identify.

The first thing to understand is that improving your sex life, and your intimacy with one another, is the ultimate goal of romance. Your goal should be to seduce your partner. Whether you are wanting to move forward in a new relationship, or revive an old one, what's the point of going all out to seduce your lover and create a new level of passion and anticipation throughout the evening, then sit around and watch TV for the rest of the night?

It doesn't matter how wild your sex life is, with very few exceptions, everyone gets bored without some variety.
To the person that eats steak every night, a hamburger once in a while becomes a special treat.

The same goes for sex. If you and your lover have sex in every room of the house, and perform gymnastics that would qualify you for the Olympics, maybe you should try something more sedate. On the other hand, if your sex life consists of the missionary position in bed with the lights off, maybe it's time to turn on some lights, move to the living room, and start trying some of the gymnastics.

Planning a Romantic Evening.
Have you ever noticed that even if you know something, when you start making plans, it slips your mind until someone else reminds you of it?

Because of this, I'll get to the actual details for the night shortly, but there's a few things many of you need to know, or at least be reminded of before you jump right in and start making preparations.

Romance takes many forms. Candle lit dinners with soft music is romantic. So is being tied up and blindfolded. Your idea of romance may not be the same as your partner's, and there's no reason you can't create a different mood on different occasions. Why can't one weekend be the candle light and dancing, and another weekend can be the whips and chains? The more you experiment, and the wider variety of things you try, the more fun you'll end up having. Just be careful and use a little common sense if you're going to try something new that may be intimidating to some people.

Whatever your theme for the evening will be, before you even get started, make sure you will not be interrupted. Lock the doors, tape a sign to it that says 'Go Away', and un-plug all the telephones in your house.
For those of you with young children, I don't care how much you love them, they need to be at a baby sitter's that you can trust completely, because the first thing you are going to do for tonight is let the babysitter know you cannot be contacted by phone since you will be taking it off the hook.

If you can't live with the thought that the babysitter can't call in an emergency, then find a babysitter that lives close enough to come and get you, ask a neighbor to take a call in an emergency, or get a cheap pager or cell phone and only give the number to the babysitter. Whatever you have to do, do something, because you don't want to be disturbed by phone calls. Even if you let the answering machine take your calls, the phone ringing in itself is a distraction you don't want, or need, when setting aside time for your relationship. If you're worried about your boss, a client, or a co-worker calling you, then get your priorities in order. I may work to live, but I don't live to work. If your friends, your family, or your job are so important that you can't risk not taking phone calls for one night, then I pity you. You are obviously an individual that is far too important to even be involved in a relationship with another person, and I am thankful I am not you.

Go slow! Seduction means anticipation.
Make the anticipation build throughout the evening for both of you. This may not be easy, and you will have to be able to read your lover's body language enough to make sure anticipation doesn't turn in to frustration. Prolonging the love making for an hour or two should be fine. Prolonging it for four or five hours is probably too long. If your lover is constantly making advances and you keep pushing him or her away throughout the evening, the result will be frustration, and in some cases, that may be the very thing you are trying to overcome in your relationship by planning this evening.

The best way to make sure things last without dragging them out too long is to start the evening about an hour before dinner. Depending on whether you are going to seduce your spouse or lover that lives with you, or you each have you own place will depend on when you get the evening started.

If you are going to seduce your spouse or a live in lover, and it is a work day, plan on having dinner about an hour after both of you are home. If it's a weekend, get showered and dressed about an hour before dinner, and ask your partner to do the same. If you are inviting a lover over that doesn't live with you, have them arrive about an hour before dinner.

Once you are both dressed, or your lover has arrived, put dinner in the oven, pour two glasses of wine, turn on some soft music and keep the volume low, then sit down together and talk while dinner is cooking. Don't turn on the TV. In fact, it your partner is one of those individuals that just can't seem to survive without turning on the TV when they get home, then take the batteries out of the remote (this will usually take care of the problem for most men, though they may become mesmerized and stare at the blank screen, or beat the remote on the coffee table repeatedly trying to make it work. For women, you may have to unplug the thing, since they seem to know how to turn it on and even change the channel without the remote).

Your goal at this point should be to develop the communication skills between your partner and yourself during this time, and it can be a make-it-or-break-it situation for many people. If you're having problems in your relationship, don't talk about them at this time. Direct the conversation around the fact you love one another. Compliment your partner's clothing and appearance, and ask your partner how he or she likes the outfit you are wearing. Tell them how much you love them, and how you have been looking forward to this evening.

If your lover is the type of person that complains constantly about how much they hate their job, and can drag on for hours telling you about all the horrible details of their day at work, then don't ask how their day was. In fact, if you notice them starting to talk about it, try to be subtle and lead the conversation in a different direction. Since only you know your lover, you will have to decide what to talk about, and what to avoid.

Don't use props at this time. Jumping up to go get something you bought and just can't wait to show off will draw their attention away from you. So will grabbing a magazine to show your lover a picture of the latest gadget you want or to have them read an article you liked. You want to focus your attention on each other, not the rest of the world.

While talking, be seductive. Turn sideways to face your lover. Smile a lot, & touch your lover frequently. I'm not talking about heavy petting here, so keep your hands under control. Use your finger tips more than the palms of your hands. Gentle touches to the face, arms, legs, and hands are very effective.

Communication seems be a major hurdle in many relationships, so if communicating is a problem, and you feel tension building, try adding some levity to the conversation. A little light hearted laughter may ease the tension.

If talking is simply not working, and the conversation runs dry, don't force it . Try slow dancing (thus the reason to have the soft music already playing). I know some people aren't good at dancing , but a slow dance can just be holding one another and swaying back and forth to the music (I have two left feet myself, but even I can pull that much off).

Know yourself, and know your partner.
It's important to know what type of person you are, and what type of person your partner is. Many people still have a lot of sexual hang ups, both men and women, and if you're one of them, you need to get over it because you're missing out on a lot of fun having sex. If dressing up and acting sexy embarrass you, makes you nervous, or causes you any other negative feelings, you need to realize that the things you and your lover do together are private, and the world isn't watching you perform.

Unless you know your partner intimately, don't try surprise, it usually backfires.
Surprise can be very effective to create an air of mystery and anticipation. It can also backfire. Unfortunately, the latter is usually the case. Watching couples on TV and in the movies surprise their lover with exotic evenings seems like a great plan, but the movies aren't real life, and the characters the actors are playing aren't real people in real life situations. You don't get to 'cut' the scene and start over if something goes wrong, so unless you know your partner very well, and know for sure they will react in a positive way, when planning your first evening, don't try to make it a surprise. 

If you're into B&D (Bondage & Discipline), and you're with a timid woman, showing her your collection of whips and chains and telling her you want to tie her to the bed and make her tell you how naughty she is so you can spank her may make her open up and try it, or it may send her running. This may actually send some men running too.

Along those same lines, if you're into threesomes, and you invite a third party to show up unexpectedly, you may get lucky... or you may get slapped and dumped on the spot.

The point I'm trying to make here is that you need to know who you are, who your partner is, and know how to handle the evening to keep it from turning into a disaster for both of you. If you and your partner are not compatible when it comes to sexual experimentation, then both of you are going to have to be willing to compromise on different occasions to fulfill each others desires. Refusing to do the things one another enjoys can be devastating to a relationship.

Communicate your intentions for the evening.
Tell your lover in advance that the two of you are going to have a romantic dinner on Friday night, or whenever. Let them know you want them to dress nice, and that there will be candle light and soft music, and that afterwards you would like to spend the evening talking, making love, and trying new things. If you're going to try something a little exotic, such as bondage and discipline for the first time, tell them in advance. Tell them that you have bought a blindfold and some restraints, and after dinner you are going to tie him/her up and play out some fantasies. Let them know you're goal is to create an evening together like you've never had before, or haven't had in a long time.
You don't have to give everything away, but let them know what to expect so that you don't get rejected. Being told 'No' half way into your evening can, and usually does, destroy the mood, and sometimes the relationship. I use B&D a lot as an example because it's one of the most popular ways to explore new sexual experiences, it's an area that many people want to experiment with, and it's an area that many people are afraid of. A lot of trust is required to let someone physically restrain you, especially if you're blindfolded.

Making preparations.
Candle light and soft music are always romantic, but don't stop there. A candle lit dinner with soft music in the background is the obvious choice for a romantic evening, and it's always good for setting the mood, but we're going to take it a step farther. Don't make it boring, especially if you're married or in a mature relationship. Just adding candles to the table isn't going to make this meal any different than any other meal. You're either trying to create some new emotions in your relationship, or revive some emotions that have subsided over time. You can't do that effectively if the surroundings are the same as every other night. Get some new things that your partner has never seen before, such as a new tablecloth, new place settings, new silverware, & new wine glasses. Change the decor in the dining room by getting some new paintings or curtains. Do the same in the living room, den, bedroom, or whatever rooms of the house you are going to be using for the rest of the night. Moving the furniture around and adding a few new pictures or accessories will have a positive effect by creating the illusion of new surroundings, eliminating some of the complacency we discussed earlier. Remember, you're goal is to create an evening together like you've never had before, or haven't had in a long time.

If you're not offended by erotic images, then look for some paintings or statues of nudes, especially couples embracing, to help set the mood for the evening. I realize that some people look at all nudity as pornography, even the statue of Venus or David, so you will have to go with what you feel comfortable with, but unless you have a religious or moral objection to erotic images, try to expand your perceptions. Remember, the whole world isn't going to be looking in your window to see what's on your walls, and if displaying erotic art embarrasses you, you can always put the paintings and sculptures away when your mother or mother-in-law comes to visit (or before the kids come back from the baby by sitter's).

Dress for sex.
You may have a wardrobe full of clothes and can create different outfits for different evenings, but unless your lover has never seen what you have hanging in your closet, and you already have some very erotic outfits, don't just go through your clothes looking for something sexy. Get something new for tonight. Just like the dinner setting, you don't want your partner to see the same thing he or she has seen before. Even if you already have stockings and a garter belt, if your lover has already seen them, get some new ones in different colors or with different styles.

There are dozens of different styles of erotic underwear for both men and women. Buy a variety in advance, then you can mix and match them on different occasions. After all, this evening should only be the first of many erotic nights you and your lover share.

Get your partner to dress for sex as well.
Try buying your partner their clothing an underwear. This may seem like an odd suggestion to many people, but since buying clothes is usually a somewhat personal experience, it will actually help bring you and your lover closer. Just be careful if you try to buy them as a surprise. As I said before, surprise does not always have the desired results, and unless your partner knows in advance that what you will be buying is of an erotic nature, he or she may refuse to wear it once the packages arrive

If you're not sure how to approach this idea with your lover, the best way is to bring it up after you have suggested a romantic evening together. Once you receive a positive response, tell your lover that want to create a night of intimacy, passion, and try some new things. When they ask 'Like What?' continue and explain that you want it to be a very erotic experience for both of you, and that you would like to buy both of you something new and erotic for the evening.

Once your lover agrees, use the internet to your advantage rather than making time to run around to different clothing stores. The idea of you buying your lover's clothing may seem fine at home, but once the two of you are actually at the store, one or both of you may begin to feel uncomfortable, especially when you start shopping for erotic underwear, which is usually not available at most stores, and will require you to visit an adult shop. It's much easier, and more comfortable to shop from your home, and you can visit adult toy sites without the risk of embarrassment.

Clothing suggestions for you and your partner.
Comfort is relative, so you can be as comfortable as you want when you're visiting your relatives. Tonight is not the night for old sweat pants, baggy jeans, and t shirts. It's not even the night for new sweat pants, baggy jeans, and t shirts. You can be comfortable and still dress nice.

Sexy clothing can be almost anything, from the rugged flannel shirt, jeans, and work boots for a man to a cotton shirt tied at the waist and short shorts for women, but since the focus of tonight is about romance, and eventually erotic sex, you both need to go all out and dress up for the occasion.

Since this seems to be an area more men seem to have trouble with than women (since I'm a man, I'm allowed to admit that on all of our behalves), we'll deal with the man's wardrobe first.

The first thing to do is forget the cotton boxers or tighty whitey briefs. There are a wide variety of men's G-strings and silk boxers available in different colors or with prints, so go online and find a pair that your lover likes, and buy them. If you've never worn a men's G-string before, get two (Available at: Passions Unchained Sex Toys  Adam & Eve Sex Toys  Hustler Hollywood  Angels Toy Store ). You will want to wear one for a few days to get use to it, and you will have a new one for your lover to see on your special night.

In case you haven't looked in the mirror lately guys, men's cotton shirts are only sexy when a woman's wearing them. From what most women have told me, and reacted to positively, I recommend a button up, long sleeve, pure silk or linen shirt in either black or white. It should be loose, but not baggy. The same goes for the slacks. Choose either black or dark blue in color, and keep them loose enough to move, but not so baggy you could use them as a car cover when you're not wearing them. Suits are nice if you're going out, but we're talking about a romantic evening at home right now, so while a sport jacket is fine, leave the suit for a later date.

As far as slacks go, ditch the denim and corduroy for tonight. There are a number of styles of men's slacks available with a pleated front and cuffed bottom to add a touch of style, and fabrics ranging from pure silk to a silk and cotton blend, worsted wool, worsted wool & gabardine, worsted wool and cashmere, pure linen, or a linen & cotton blend. Unless you're allergic to every one of these, try to avoid something common like polyester and rayon.
This should go without saying, but tennis shoes, sandals, and hiking boots will not get you rave reviews in a fashion magazine, and are not suitable for the evening we are discussing. Get a nice pair of Italian wing tips for tonight. They're a little more expensive, but you will look good, and they're comfortable. If wing tips aren't your style, then at least get a pair of nice leather dress shoes.

Women have many more options than men when it comes to clothing. Although a sexy dress or gown always comes to mind when thinking of a romantic evening, I've known a few women that aren't comfortable in a dress, so for the men out there putting this evening together, if the woman you are preparing this evening for refuses to wear a dress, then don't try to force the issue. Jeans and a nice blouse may not be as romantic as an evening gown, but they can be just as sexy.

Ladies, if you are insistent about not wearing a dress or skirt, don't just throw on any old jeans and shirt for this evening. Find some nice designer jeans that are tight enough to show off your assets, and that ride as low on your hips as possible without falling down. You may not think this style is sexy, and maybe your partner doesn't either, but it doesn't hurt to check out a few different styles on line and get your partners opinion. You may be surprised at what makes his eyes bulge out of his head. When you choose a blouse, I recommend getting one that buttons up the front for two reasons. One, you can leave enough buttons undone to tease your partner by showing off an ample amount of cleavage. Two, when you move past dinner to the more intimate part of the night, your lover can look into your eyes or kiss their way down your tummy as they unbutton your blouse.

If you enjoy wearing dresses, make sure it's sheer, seductive, and shows some cleavage. The exception to that would be if you chose a style of dress that is backless and attaches around the neck. Although many of these are open in front to expose some cleavage, even the ones that aren't are still sexy if they allow your nipples to push against the fabric.

Most sexy dresses require they be stepped into or pulled on from the top, so the button up front advantage a blouse offers may not apply. That's OK, because most dresses have long zippered backs, and it's just as sexy for a man to kiss his way down a woman's back as he unzips the dress. Just remember ladies, if you have to struggle to get the dress on, you'll probably have to struggle to get it off. Chose a dress that can easily fall off of your body once unzipped, allowing you to step out of it gracefully. This is much more romantic than trying to pull a dress over your head, especially if your necklace or earrings get caught in the fabric.

Whether you will be wearing jeans, a skirt, or a dress, you will need a pair of high heels. Sorry, but unlike the dress versus jeans issue, this is not an option. I know that many women don't like high heels, and believe they were created by a man as a torture device, but they make your legs look longer, your butt tighter, and they turn men on, so take advantage of that fact and get yourself some nice high heels. By the way, no cheating here with a pair of everyday 3" low heels. High heels mean just that, so get a pair that has a MINIMUM of a 4" or 5" heel. (Available at: Passions Unchained Sex Toys  Angels Toy Store)

Next, forget the panty hose (even the crotchless ones) and get a garter belt and stockings in either natural tones, colors, or fishnets, whatever you prefer. Even if you are going to wear jeans or slacks instead of a skirts or dress, they will be coming off later in the evening. Although you may excuse yourself to go 'slip into something more comfortable' at some point, when things start getting passionate, you may not want to risk putting the mood on hold by slipping away. Not only will you be prepared by putting on the garter belt and stockings in advanced, you'll also feel sexier throughout the evening wearing them.

You can choose either a G-String or panties, but if you choose panties, they should be crotchless to add an even more erotic touch. If you can't bring yourself to wear a G-String or crotchless panties, at least get some silk or satin panties that are as sexy as you can find, and in a color that matches or compliments the garter belt (Available at: Passions Unchained Sex Toys  Adam & Eve Sex Toys  Hustler Hollywood  Angels Toy Store ).

Whether you choose to wear a bra or not is up to you. Personally, when the clothes come off, I think a sexy bra adds to the overall erotic look, and you can always take it off later. If you do wear a bra, find the most erotic one you can. A half shelf bra that leaves your nipples exposed will drive your lover crazy with desire as long as you choose a dress or blouse that is either sheer or clings to you enough to allow your nipples to be visible pushing against the fabric.

Accessorize your wardrobe.
I prefer the look of long, dangly, and slightly excessive diamond earrings on a woman. They add both a touch of class, and trash, which is something very few other jewelry items can do. If you like hoops or studs, then you can go that route, but at least try the look of some 'over the top' diamond earrings before you decide against them. I also like bracelets, but I recommend going with something like a simple gold chain with inlaid diamonds rather than a charm bracelet. Bracelets with charms hanging off of them can be a little too delicate during the wild throngs of passionate sex, and they can get caught in clothing or scratch your partner in a way that may not be pleasurable.

The same applies to a necklace with a charm that has a lot of sharp edges. Smooth designs usually don't create a problem later into the evening. Rings usually need to be smooth also, especially men's rings. Whether you like ankle bracelets or waist chains is up to you, but keep in mind the problems that can arise if you like to hang charms on them.

If you're thinking that the style of jewelry you wear doesn't matter since you will be taking it off when you have sex, think again.

If you normally take your jewelry off before making love, plan on leaving it on tonight... all night. If you normally leave it on when making love, make sure you get something extraordinary for tonight. Remember, you want to mix things up a little tonight, and something as simple as a different style of earrings can make a big difference. While we're on the subject, unless your partner has a foot fetish, plan on leaving your high heels on as well.

For the guys, if your accessories consist of a plastic, digital sports watch that beeps every half hour and has a face that glows in the dark, lose it and get yourself a real one. While you're at it, dump the dog tags and the plastic thing on your wrist, the 20 pound gold chains that hang to your waist, or whatever else you might normally wear, and step up to something more classy and fashionable. Whether you're into gold, silver, or titanium, if your woman is making an effort to enhance your love life by getting dressed up for you, then do the same for her.

Also, follow the same tips regarding leaving jewelry on, except for your watch. Even though you've made sure to choose your other jewelry without sharp edges, watch bands and winding stems have a way of scratching your partner, and not in a good way. So the watch always comes off.

The last accessory is just as important. If you or your partner have body peircings, then don't forget to get some new body jewelry for the occasion. I know the selection is a little limited, but you can be creative. A simple pair of gold nipple rings with a gold chain connecting them can create a new visual treat for your lover. You can also use a chain to connect them to a belly button ring. A more daring idea is the same long, excessive diamond earrings I mentioned earlier. You can attach them to an existing pair of nipple rings or a belly button ring since the wire is usually dangerously small to risk actually putting through the holes in your nipples or belly button. The result is a new visual stimulation for your lover, and the added weight pulling on your nipples can be a new heightened sensation for you if you've never tried it before.

Although adding accessories to genital peircings can be extremely erotic, use caution if you try this. The accessories can get caught in your underwear when you are sitting. If this happens, when you stand up you may experience a new level of pain that you never knew existed.

If you don't have pierced nipples, there are a large number of vibrating and non-vibrating nipple clamps you can choose from (Available at: Passions Unchained Sex Toys  Adam & Eve Sex Toys  Hustler Hollywood  Angels Toy Store ).

Meal suggestions.
Actually, this is more a guideline for what NOT to serve. The meal does not have to be elaborate, and should not be something that will require you to stand over the stove and prepare, such as a delicate sauce that doesn't stand up to refrigeration and re-heating well. Even pasta with a light lemon and dill sauce will require you to make final preparations at the last second, as the sauce will lose it's body if you try to re-heat it. You want the meal light so you both avoid becoming over stuffed or getting indigestion, so you also need to avoid foods with overly heavy or spicy sauces. If you do want to add a sauce, hollandaise sauce can be made in advance, refrigerated, and it does hold up fine when re-heated if you add a tablespoon of water.

Whatever you decide on, you don't want to turn this night into a workout in the kitchen (well, that is an option after dinner, but not while you're actually cooking), so try to choose something simple that you can prepare ahead of time and either cook in the oven, or refrigerate and heat up in the oven later.

A few examples of some menu choices would be to skip the appetizer and start with a Greek salad or Chef salad with a light dressing to start, followed by a simple vegetable casserole, a roast duck or pheasant with a glaze that can be added prior to baking rather than a sauce, or a prime rib cooked with baby potatoes. Any of these will allow you to do most of the preparation, and clean up, in advance.

When it's time to start cooking, simply toss your dinner in the oven. You won't have a stack of pots and pans to worry about cleaning up later, and you won't be so exhausted from cooking you don't feel very romantic the rest of the evening. Also, when you take the meal out of the oven, put it on a serving platter and fill whatever roasting pan you used with water and leave it for tomorrow. The same goes for the dinner dishes. I promise the world won't come to an end if you just rinse things off for the night and take care of the actual cleaning the next day. The meal is just the start of the evening, so don't bog yourself down afterwards by insisting on cleaning the kitchen before moving on to the intimate part of the evening.

Choose a good wine to go with your meal.
A good wine is always a welcome accompaniment to any meal, especially a romantic one, and it's effect can help alleviate some inhibitions you may have should you be trying something new. A bad wine is worthless, and can undermine all of your efforts as quickly as a bad meal, especially if your lover knows anything about wines. Unless you are a wine connoisseur, choosing a good wine may be intimidating, and most of the people I've met working at the local liquor store wouldn't know a Chardonnay from a Cabernet, let alone a La Bastide Dauzac Margaux from a Chateau Trimoulet St. Emilion Grand Cru. If you're not wine savvy, and don't know someone that is, the internet is not only a good source of information, but you can purchase some very good vintage 1999 to 2002 import and domestic wines on line. The cost is reasonable, usually $60 to $70 a bottle, though there may be some shipping restrictions depending on the state or country you live in.

Eat dessert in a room other than the dining room.
Another reason you don't want to be over stuffed by the meal is so you have room for dessert. And since we're talking about a romantic evening, obviously the dessert will serve another purpose besides satisfying a sweet tooth. Unless you are going to be having sex on the dining room table, serve the dessert in the room where the passion is going to start turning into action. Although you can choose almost any dish you like, the standard strawberries and non-dairy whipped topping are always a favorite. Don't use real whipped cream. Regardless of how much better it tastes, when using it for sexual stimulation by applying it to your partners body and licking it off, it doesn't take long to develop a sour smell, and this will ruin the evening. Melted chocolate or honey are enjoyable as well. You just have to remember to monitor the temperature of the chocolate, and that both of these contain sugar, so they require you to be very thorough when licking it off of your partners body to prevent becoming sticky.

Although this may not seem like a bad thing, and sweat will usually take care of most residue, the sticky sugars can get caught in body hair, creating a painful rather than pleasurable experience. I know watching honey being poured all over someone's body on TV looks exciting, but again, TV isn't real life. If you're new to using syrups or honey for sex, use it sparingly so you will be able to lick it all off.

Other foods that make good alternatives are caviar, ice cream, chocolate or other flavored puddings, any flavored syrups used to make flavored milk or ice cream topping, and maraschino cherries. Some not-so common options are maple or flavored pancake syrups (just as sticky as honey), and almost any condiment such as ketchup, mustard, miracle whip, or pickle relish so long as you and your partner actually enjoy the taste well enough to eat directly off of each other's bodies. Basically, almost anything you like the taste of can be used as a sexual treat, so if you've already done the strawberries and whipped cream before, try something else for a change of pace.

A word of caution:  Don't insert food into a woman's vagina.  Many foods contain sugars and natural chemicals that can cause infection.  Some foods can even cause problems if placed on a man's penis.  To add flavor to your partner's genitals, use a flavored lubricant or lotion designed for this purpose (Available at: Passions Unchained Sex Toys  Adam & Eve Sex Toys  Hustler Hollywood  Angels Toy Store ).

Props.
Props can be anything you choose. The only thing that matters when choosing props is that if you choose restraints, handcuffs, paddles, or other B&D gear, your partner must be a willing participant. Some of the more common, and effective props are: Candy & Flowers, Silk or Satin Sheets and Pillow Cases for the bed, Scented Candles*, Music that matches both of your tastes, Feathers, Silk or Satin gloves, Sex toys of any kind, Massage Oils and Lotions, Flavored Body Oils, Erotic Underwear, Erotic Lingerie, Jewelry, Body Jewelry, Body Paints, Sexy Clothing, Sexy Costumes, Stiletto Heels for women, New make-up for women, New cologne or perfume, Erotic DVDs, & Bondage Gear.

*If you and your lover are going to try dripping hot wax on each other's body, avoid the colored or scented candles. The materials used to color and scent the candle holds the heat longer, and can result in a little too much warmth. Use a white, unscented candle, and hold it approximately 12" to 14" away from your lover's body. If this still creates too much heat to be comfortable, move it farther away. A good tip is to experiment on your own skin prior to dripping the wax on your partner, especially on sensitive areas like the nipples. Another thing to remember is that once the wax dries, it can pull on body hair, so if you are dripping it on a male, avoid the chest hair as much as possible and concentrate on the smoother regions of his body. On males and females, avoid dripping hot wax on unshaven pubic regions. For more pleasure, try a massage oil candle (Available at: Passions Unchained Sex Toys  Adam & Eve Sex Toys  Hustler Hollywood  Angels Toy Store ).  These candles are actually massage oil that liquefies when you light them.

A less common prop is the lighting. Dimmer switches are a great start, but try replacing your white light bulbs with soft pink ones. They create a much softer, more flattering glow, especially on a nude body, and they can help hide any imperfections you may be self conscience about.

Unless you're wanting to get into some wild imagery, avoid black lights. In most cases, the results can be pretty scary, although they can definitely create a different atmosphere than what you may have experienced in the past.
If you have a four poster bed with tall posts, another thing you can try is adding sheer or lace panels surrounding the bed. You can also accomplish this without a four poster bed if you attach the panels to the ceiling.

Erotic movies are a good prop to help get the evening started. If you and your lover watch them all the time before having sex, then avoid them tonight. If you and your lover seldom, if ever watch an X rated movie together, then try putting one in after dinner (Available at: Passions Unchained Sex Toys  Adam & Eve Sex Toys  Hustler Hollywood  Angels Toy Store ).

Probably one of the best props is the Liberator Ramp & Wedge Combo and the Pleasure Swings (Available at: Passions Unchained Sex Toys  Adam & Eve Sex Toys  Hustler Hollywood  Angels Toy Store ). The incredibly deep penetration you achieve during intercourse with the Liberator Ramp & Wedge Combo can't be duplicated with pillows, and the positions you can try during intercourse and oral sex with a sex swing cannot be duplicated without one. Most of the better quality swings can be used with or without restraints, so they're not only for the B&D crowd. If you can't attach a sex swing to the rafters of your home, or you don't want the permanent eye bolts in your ceiling, there are stands available that will not only hold the swing, but don't require any permanent mounting location. Even if you do want to mount the swing in one particular location in your ceiling, the sex swing stands will allow you to move the swing to other rooms to allow for even more variety.

Since everyone is different, I can't tell you exactly what to buy for dinner, or what paintings you hang on your wall that will entice your lover. I'm also not going to tell you at what point the evening should start becoming physical, or what positions to try. These are the things you need to decide on as the evening progresses. Just remember to be creative, and make it as new and fresh as possible. As far as shopping for erotic clothing, and everything else I have mentioned, Passions Unchained Sex Toys, Adam & Eve, Hustler Hollywood, and Angels Toy Store has everything you will need.

Are there other things you can try? Of course, but hopefully I've given you enough ideas to get your own imagination going to create a romantic evening you and your lover will not soon forget.

Now we'll talk about a few tips for a romantic weekend.

Sexy Weekend Getaways: Two Days of Sexual Ecstasy... or Longer.

Just like a romantic evening with your lover, a weekend getaway is designed to allow you and your partner the chance to focus on your relationship.

Weekend getaways, whether they are at home or away, can be a great way to either move a new relationship forward, or help to revive a mature relationship.

For a weekend getaway at home, a few ground rules have to be put in place first to make sure the weekend does qualify as a true getaway.

Just like a night of romance, a weekend getaway means no distractions. No phone, no kids, no friends or family dropping by.

If your home is the local hang out for your friends, let them know not to come around this weekend, and put a 'Do Not Disturb' or 'GO AWAY!' sign on your front and back door if necessary.

The television and stereo are off limits except for a collection of DVDs and CDs you select in advance. The DVDs should be erotic. Whether they are X rated, or XXX rated, you want the focus of the DVD to be on sex.  If you don't have a good adult book store in your area, or you prefer shopping for adult products incognito, There are hundreds of softcore and hardcore adult DVDs available at Passions Unchained Sex Toys,  Adam & Eve Sex Toys,  Hustler Hollywood, and  Angels Toy Store.

CDs can be a collection of anything, from classical to rock. In fact, you can focus much of your love making around the music you select. Vary your love making throughout the weekend by selecting a CD with soft music and make slow, passionate love, then later, select something with an aggressive beat and start swinging from the bed posts.  Even if your intention is to have marathon sex and stay in bed for 48 hours having as much sex as possible, there may be some 'down time' during the passion. You may also find that a steady stream of XXX rated DVDs can become mind numbing. So what do you do during these times? Play games or take turns giving one another a sensual massage.

I'm not talking about Monopoly or Chess here. Get a few sex games for the weekend (Available at: Passions Unchained Sex Toys  Adam & Eve Sex Toys  Hustler Hollywood  Angels Toy Store ). They are a great way to have fun with your partner and keep the focus on sex throughout the weekend, which is what you are trying to do in the first place by planning a weekend getaway.

I know I said this already, but in case anyone missed it, I'm going to repeat it here for anyone that didn't read it earlier, and I'm going to expand on it a little.

The first thing to understand is that improving your sex life, and your intimacy with one another, is the ultimate goal of romance. Your goal should be to seduce your partner. Whether you are wanting to move forward in a new relationship, or revive an old one, what's the point of going all out to seduce your lover and create a new level of passion and anticipation, then sit around and watch TV for the rest of the weekend?

If you are having some problems in your relationship, a weekend getaway may be a good starting point to try and resolve them. If your sex life is great, but the rest of your relationship is suffering, then take advantage of the fact you do have a good sex life, and use a weekend of sexual experimentation as a way to try and open the lines of communication and talk about the other areas or your relationship that need work. Although I can't address every possible situation, being 'stuck' with each other for 48 hours straight with no other diversions may be just what you and your lover need. After all, barring the possibility you are going for a weekend of marathon sex, you are going to have a lot of time to fill between the actual love making.

For a weekend getaway away from home, you can choose either a hotel, a bed and breakfast, or resort.
If you chose a resort or a bed and breakfast, try to find one that offers couples only options. Again, as wonderful as children are, while you're trying to liven up your sex life, and possibly save or revive a failing relationship, you need to be able to devote your undivided attention to your partner. Having your children, or other people's children around can be a distraction.

I know it's a horrible thing to say, but the fact is, some people feel their children are the cause of their marital problems. Whether this is true or not, even in the most loving families, mom and dad need some time alone to indulge themselves in the adult pleasures they enjoyed creating the kids in the first place. A weekend away from the kids may be enough to change the outlook of the partner that actually does feel the kids are creating a strain on the marriage.

If you choose a motel, you won't have the couples only option, but you can always explain to the person you are making the reservations with that you and your partner are looking for a place for a quiet, romantic weekend together, and tell them you will need a room away from the public areas where there will not be children playing tag and running up and down the halls. Don't be shy or apologetic about telling them what you want. Most quality hotels will be willing to accommodate your requests without hesitation. If the one you have chosen is hesitant about guaranteeing your satisfaction at the time you make your reservation, find a better one.

When it comes to choosing a motel, the sleazy 'no-tell motel' may offer vibrating beds, in-room hot tubs, and XXX pay per view movies, but unless you're playing out a Hooker-and-her-John fantasy, I wouldn't recommend them.

Even if you are playing out a Hooker-and-her-John fantasy, I still wouldn't recommend them. If you insist on going to this type of motel, I will recommend brining along a lot of disinfectant and bug killing sprays.

Playing out a fantasy can be a great way to add some new levels of excitement to an older relationship, and f you are wanting to play a Hooker fantasy for the weekend, step it up a little to a Call-Girl fantasy and choose a nice hotel. After all, you're going to be there all weekend, and you may want to play out other fantasies, or actually take time to enjoy some of the amenities the establishment offers. For costumes to play out a fantasy, visit Passions Unchained Sex Toys,  Adam & Eve Sex Toys,  Hustler Hollywood, and  Angels Toy Store.

Whether you are playing out a fantasy, or just wanting to get away together for the weekend, keep some of the same things in mind we covered for the romantic evening scenario. Since the motel or resort will already be new and unfamiliar surroundings, you and your partner will already have a heightened sense of awareness as you check the place out, but don't rely only on only your surroundings being different to make the weekend a success.

You will still want your partner to see you in something different than they have in the past, but you now have the opportunity to take it one step farther. You will definitely want some new sex toys for the weekend. Whether or not they all perform the same task, items like different vibrators offer different visual experiences. You will also want some new clothes that your partner has never seen you wear before.

Since you will be there at least two days, you will have the chance to put on some casual outfits for lunch or for going out for a walk, and some semi formal or formal dress clothes for a night or two of dining and dancing. For the women, this is your chance to go all out with a nice evening gown with all of the accessories. For the men reading this, this it the time for the new suit, complete with a dress shirt and tie. Whether you like suits or not doesn't matter. If the woman in your life is going to look like a million bucks, don't be an embarrassment to her, or to yourself, by having the door man or the valet being dressed better than you are.

If you find a motel far enough away from your home town, the chances are better that you will not run into someone you know. Keeping this in mind, you can risk being a little risquι in your attire, and maybe wear something more sexy and revealing than you normally would around your home town. I find it a turn on knowing the lady I am with is desirable and getting stared at by other men, and by other women. Of course some men, and some women, are insecure and get jealous when their lover gets looks from others, so you will have to know your partner's disposition before being too sexy in public. You can't get close to your lover if he or she is in jail facing assault and battery charges.

When making your reservations at a motel, try to find one with a large bathtub complete with water jets.  Although skinny dipping or having sex in the public pool or hot tub at a motel is fun, it's frowned upon by the management, and you could get kicked out of the motel, or even get arrested for indecency or public exposure, so use caution if you try either of these.

What is allowed is wearing extremely erotic swimwear. Climbing out of a pool dripping wet is a turn on in itself, but when you are wearing a swimsuit that shows off your assets, it can drive your partner crazy with desire. Again, you have to realize that you will be attracting not only the attention of your partner, but other's in the pool or hot tub area.
Having sex outdoors is extremely erotic, and finding a remote location to go skinny dipping and make love in the water or on the shoreline is a new level of ecstasy. Keep this in mind when planning a weekend getaway. Some of the more remote locations, such as the mountains or near the beach may allow you and your lover the chance to find a secluded lake or stretch of beach that will afford you the privacy to let yourselves go.

Whether you are going to find a motel, a bed and breakfast, or a resort, keep in mind that even if you are just going to arrive Saturday morning and leave Sunday evening, make sure they have at least one formal, five star restaurant nearby so you can indulge in at least one night of dinner and dancing with your partner. This is part of the romance of going some place new. After all, if you're going to stay in bed all weekend, you can do that at home.

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